Health
MIRAGE
The combination of my father’s death and my personal background lit a fire in me to know more. He was admitted to the hospital on June 24, 2016, and he died on July 18. Only 24 days passed between the first sign there was a problem and his subsequent death.

Now, hearing that he was in end-stage cirrhosis didn’t surprise me, given his heavy drinking. What did surprise me was that he’d visited several doctors and specialists in the months before his death, and no one knew his liver was struggling either.

So what happened? Does end-stage liver cirrhosis really sneak up that fast? Were there other signs that would have alerted someone to his failing liver?

As for why the doctors and specialists didn’t know what was happening, that mystery resolved reasonably quickly. The plain truth is that alcoholics rarely divulge the amount and frequency of their drinking to their doctors. This was the case for my dad. He had many health issues that he was trying to solve, but he protected his drinking habit fiercely. So he refused to spill the beans, even when it mattered.

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Protein
MIRAGE




Terry Hope Romero noticed that her vegan diet left her unsatisfied and lacking energy throughout the day. “When you work full time and have a long commute, and you regularly work out or you have a lot of errands to run, it can be easy to fill up on processed carbs,” says Romero. “To feel full every day, especially when you’re working out to build muscle, it’s not really the best approach.” Protein takes longer to digest, which makes you feel full and energized. When Romero started consuming more protein (by adding natural protein powders like hemp protein and brown rice protein to everyday foods, as featured in the recipes of her book Protein Ninja), she started feeling stronger and more satisfied.

Terry Hope Romero noticed that her vegan diet left her unsatisfied and lacking energy throughout the day. “When you work full time and have a long commute, and you regularly work out or you have a lot of errands to run, it can be easy to fill up on processed carbs,” says Romero. “To feel full every day, especially when you’re working out to build muscle, it’s not really the best approach.” Protein takes longer to digest, which makes you feel full and energized. When Romero started consuming more protein (by adding natural protein powders like hemp protein and brown rice protein to everyday foods, as featured in the recipes of her book Protein Ninja), she started feeling stronger and more satisfied.


Terry Hope Romero noticed that her vegan diet left her unsatisfied and lacking energy throughout the day. “When you work full time and have a long commute, and you regularly work out or you have a lot of errands to run, it can be easy to fill up on processed carbs,” says Romero. “To feel full every day, especially when you’re working out to build muscle, it’s not really the best approach.” Protein takes longer to digest, which makes you feel full and energized. When Romero started consuming more protein (by adding natural protein powders like hemp protein and brown rice protein to everyday foods, as featured in the recipes of her book Protein Ninja), she started feeling stronger and more satisfied.


Terry Hope Romero noticed that her vegan diet left her unsatisfied and lacking energy throughout the day. “When you work full time and have a long commute, and you regularly work out or you have a lot of errands to run, it can be easy to fill up on processed carbs,” says Romero. “To feel full every day, especially when you’re working out to build muscle, it’s not really the best approach.” Protein takes longer to digest, which makes you feel full and energized. When Romero started consuming more protein (by adding natural protein powders like hemp protein and brown rice protein to everyday foods, as featured in the recipes of her book Protein Ninja), she started feeling stronger and more satisfied.


Terry Hope Romero noticed that her vegan diet left her unsatisfied and lacking energy throughout the day. “When you work full time and have a long commute, and you regularly work out or you have a lot of errands to run, it can be easy to fill up on processed carbs,” says Romero. “To feel full every day, especially when you’re working out to build muscle, it’s not really the best approach.” Protein takes longer to digest, which makes you feel full and energized. When Romero started consuming more protein (by adding natural protein powders like hemp protein and brown rice protein to everyday foods, as featured in the recipes of her book Protein Ninja), she started feeling stronger and more satisfied.
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Beauty for all
MIRAGE
Black-owned makeup brands are finally getting the star treatment. While some of the new attention may have stemmed from far from glamorous reasons over the past year, it’s still about time and a distinct sign of progress. These Black-owned businesses and many others could use your support all year long—something that even Amazon has realized by creating a new shopping section called Buy Black. Overdue recognition aside, the beauty companies on this list should be on your radar because they are amazing. Many Black-owned beauty products were created to satisfy the neglected needs of women of color, and therefore, a lot of thought, care, and detailed attention went into their creation, so they address a variety of concerns and produce serious results.

With their stellar ingredients and extensive color palettes, these companies create top-notch products that will help you look instantly put together. But their true beauty lies in the fact that they treat women as individuals and, in the process, deliver the gift of gorgeous to faces of all shades. Try them once and you’ll be a fan for life.


Black-owned makeup brands are finally getting the star treatment. While some of the new attention may have stemmed from far from glamorous reasons over the past year, it’s still about time and a distinct sign of progress. These Black-owned businesses and many others could use your support all year long—something that even Amazon has realized by creating a new shopping section called Buy Black. Overdue recognition aside, the beauty companies on this list should be on your radar because they are amazing. Many Black-owned beauty products were created to satisfy the neglected needs of women of color, and therefore, a lot of thought, care, and detailed attention went into their creation, so they address a variety of concerns and produce serious results.

With their stellar ingredients and extensive color palettes, these companies create top-notch products that will help you look instantly put together. But their true beauty lies in the fact that they treat women as individuals and, in the process, deliver the gift of gorgeous to faces of all shades. Try them once and you’ll be a fan for life.


Black-owned makeup brands are finally getting the star treatment. While some of the new attention may have stemmed from far from glamorous reasons over the past year, it’s still about time and a distinct sign of progress. These Black-owned businesses and many others could use your support all year long—something that even Amazon has realized by creating a new shopping section called Buy Black. Overdue recognition aside, the beauty companies on this list should be on your radar because they are amazing. Many Black-owned beauty products were created to satisfy the neglected needs of women of color, and therefore, a lot of thought, care, and detailed attention went into their creation, so they address a variety of concerns and produce serious results.

With their stellar ingredients and extensive color palettes, these companies create top-notch products that will help you look instantly put together. But their true beauty lies in the fact that they treat women as individuals and, in the process, deliver the gift of gorgeous to faces of all shades. Try them once and you’ll be a fan for life.

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Callings...
MIRAGE
Very much…how can I tell you , it’s a one ended action…when I said this its implied that I follow the same too…you don’t have to restate my statement

Let me cut the ice here….

Its not about me interacting with elders or youngsters ashwin…Unless I feel the vibes to communicate with a person, I will not force myself for a communication irrespective of their ages…When I was referring to lack of interaction with atte its just that I dint sense a comfortness in communication , and here I deviate from what you are. When I give the liberty to you to comment about Vimala Aunty’s view on certain things , for example, is to tell you…Its ok to be fair and unbiased, if a person is wrong we have all the rights in pointing out that or acknowledging the same from others, it should not be based on relationships.

I donno , whats restricting me, But I am just not going anywhere….and as said on the first day , freedom means a lot to me… I am constrained I feel and am not able to breathe life, and when I encounter your mom , I sense something is gulping me and yes I am very very psychic….Tell me clear cut what I have to do…today morning when your mom was telling that you had locked yourself up in the room and did not assist daddy in sorting out the grams and always pushing for bathe and stuff like this just suffocates me for reason unknown. I donno Ashwin , Yes you are good to your heart and I am fortunate to have you in my life and at the same time there are counter action forces and sought of diluting my feelings. I really feel sad sometimes…I am being very honest to you…and I am neither able to concentrate at work nor being soulfully dedicated to the family and I am vacillating in between and going nowhere…I felt my feelings can be better expressed in mail than face to face to conversation. I have a feeling that I am being observed in each move of mine…


Yesterday when we were up, they could also have assumed that you might have been studying for something...they always speaks of people who are pursuing their Master’s and Phd’s , I am sure they are known of the fact that Industry like mine and yours need us to be on toes and constantly revamp our skills, which means that one needs freedom of space and mind ….If there is no monetary need, I might as well quit my job and be a home maker…and now don’t revert back telling ladies are known for their multitasking capabilities and Blah , if there such capability , let me vouch that there is a serious flaw or bottleneck in either their professional or personal lives, and if they are able to strike a perfect , its just attributed by the support of their spouses.

The otherday , when I was heating the water on stove , mom spoke of wastage of LPG, had I not asked you, one should assume , that me being a new member of the family is consuming all the resources of your home and is a overhead to your family, tell me why will somebody has to put up with things like this , I think we are all equipped enough to shield ourselves and stand against all hurdles…its not that you have not noticed it, its true your mom vehemently expresses her frustration at times in both our presence. And more over , you are now married and an independent individual., you don’t have to be gripped so much and you should have the liberty to lock yourself or do what you want, even if your mom accuses you in front of me , it pinches me , as she could also me pointing out I am responsible for your actions and I do not want to put you in that mode…It should just be a fair play.

I donno blame it on my sensitivity or upbringing, things are appearing retrograde and I am not feeling positive at all. Its both my inherent problem and also those injected by the circumstances. If you or me introspect as to what have we achieved by marrying, we will get host of thoughts, good , bad and ugly.
My objective in life is to just increase the percentage of good thoughts and memories,..,.By thinking all the negativities , I getting negative each day and attracting more negatives…Donno where it all leading to. In the exterior , I might seem very composed , but am decaying in some means and most of my past time activities have gone for a task…I will still live with you till my death… but if this continue to persist over a period of time , I will start dying internally before reaching an eternal death…

And if I tell you anything ,even though I don’t intend to offend you, you always point fingers at me and just don’t seem to introspect what I say….
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Muttu Raj
MIRAGE
I love you so deeply that I have lost myself in this ocean of love

Your love is all pervasive which has made me blind in this cosmic

I have become deaf by the sound of your loving heartbeats

Your inner voice has muted my egoistical emissions

I have become submissive to your tunes of love

Your Affection and love has transcended beyond my trammel

I have become powerful by your rays of hope and positives

Your prayers have helped me to heal my body , mind and soul

I need your unconditioned love and affection

Your influence can bring out the best in me

I need your healing touch to scrub my vulnerabilities

Your shield will protect me from the evil eyes

I am your Summi

Your my love forever…….
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Nature versus Nurture
MIRAGE

Beloved Ashwin,

I understand the dynamics of the current world mandates us to be commercial in all our undertakings , right from choosing a career to lifestyle to everything in life. Yet I feel, my internal landscape is totally diverse from the external demand. I may have been raised in Bangalore, yet my genes lies in creative passion . I understand why throngs of professionals worldwide are veneering to higher professional courses to bolster their career growth , yet I am on totally different path. I don’t understand the undercurrent driving me for this action. For I have always believed that’s there is more to meet life than the professional demands, it will have to end somewhere. Well, even I divide my life into 3 quarters , I am skeptical will I have any verve to reach the pinnacle of creative satisfaction at the end of the 3rd quarter( 50 +). I am totally blued out as to how am I going to support you to mitigate the paramount demands of current culture from family standpoint. I am undergoing severe guilt pangs for not presenting you the exact picture before making a commitment, as I said the other day , I should have cogently stated what did establishment mean for me( I mentioned I am going to transition to the creative arena after attaining a level of establishment in my current professional career “ establishment made all the difference “). You would have moved on, probably to join a potential soul mate who would compliment professionally, personally and in all other aspects. Considering the other aspect, I am unsure if there is going to be an acceptance from your parents for this strive of mine.

I am unaware if I have dampened your dreams . Not sure Ashwin, nevertheless you have been your best for all these days . I do not want to override your happiness in anyways , I am stuck somewhere and this is looping subconsciously . I may have been nurtured to combat the challenges of world and to gain momentum as I traverse , yet there is this strong calling to meet my soul calling driven by nature. For all I know, you and me hail from a background where our lineage has a professional backing , and you are a man conscious to the societal structure, and my dreams are polar to those of yours and I know I am mystified in the affair between nature versus nurture.

Loving,
Summi.
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The brain beat
MIRAGE

She hesitantly boards down the bus with head banging headache and turbulent ideas of something grievously wrong in her brain functioning. This was not the first time she was experiencing something of this sought. But something was really wrong and triggered this mixed reaction that it’s the time for MRI or something. Running was something on a regular basis and this frequent occurrence of regular head ache was unusual in a way that happened when ran on the treadmill. It was a wrong day she thought all through the journey from her office to home. It was the second working day of the week, was not quite sure if it was an official influence, whatever headache is still persisting , enormously increasing with each minute. She had forgotten the pills which was always there and balms are least effective for the surmount intensity of “headache”. She finally managed to drag herself from the bus stop to her compound.
Bangs the door , as if discharging all the pain in her head on the door, she had forgotten the doorbell.
Scene1 : Mom opens the door with usual stance , propounding theory of mannerisms .That does not even excite her auditory nerves. Throws her bag hesitantly on the floor and rushes to the room.
Scene 2: Grandmother on her bed . She was just discharged from a hospital that’s famous for the cardiac related treatments, after a brief period of angiogram to determine the % of blockage in heart. She is to be admitted back after a count of 4 days for treatment at next level , mostly the bypass surgery. Aunt had pinged my mom down as she wanted someone to my grand mom’s assistance ( she was to get some flowers ). Enquired about her wellbeing with parallel head ache. Mom pops some pills into my mouth and accuses that I am responsible for my current state. There is nothing I could do then.
Scene 3: Aunt enters and gave an explanation that , running in open air and on treadmill in a claustrophobic environment are 2 different things The reduction in the oxygen levels in indoors might have triggered the ache. Mom intervenes with alternative funda , that me not having a sumptuous breakfast and skipping meals at night might still be at large for this headache. Whatever, its been 10 min I have popped the pill, waiting for the effect and suggesting a possibility of an EEG or MRI to be done to investigate the root cause for this was not the first time and this needed some serious attention. Mom walks away giving a sigh of indifference and arrogance,

Scene 4: To support my idea of getting an MRI done, gave mom an explanation of similar condition last week on a day where there was no exertion due to rigorous activity of exercise , and exemplifying the internal effect of blood gushing at the hindbrain region and relating it to the palpitation of my heart .
Mom tells “ Your brain is still beating”….

She then realised that "I am not dead".


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Here we come, here we go!!
MIRAGE


Life , why is this so mysterious, shrouded with terra incognita. The shell is so hard, inside Lie Ocean of unknown uninterrupted events sequenced to target us in all possible manners. After all we are sharing this space with a purpose. Some of us sure about something, not everything and other no clue at all. Me feeling like a lone traveler picking memories on my path of life. Life in itself is quite personal to the person, but it has an unknown, unexplored influence on others. Whatever may be the extent Man might throng to captivate the mighty nature, with his mighty intelligence, the supreme thing he can probably never break is the mystery behind life and death. What forms the life and what takes the life, the entire lifecycle between life and death is something that cannot be penetrated by the creator himself, forget the lesser mortals. Where are we all heading towards, what’s the purpose in life, why are we here , is there something that’s carried forward or have we carried something while entering this universe.
We are all so entangled and enmeshed within the temporary ingredients that comprise the lucid part of life. But whats life in its purest and inner most form. Whats the nudity in life. There is so much emotions, so much love in each of us. Few express and few, just don’t. Has god created this universe for human beings with a purpose, or has he merged both the hell and heavens. There is so much diversity everywhere in all forms. Every one feels other is better in one or the other form and each human being out here is aware of this fact. Probably every human being out here knows he is not perfect. There is nothing life the perfect in this earth.It probably might turn out to be the degree of perfectness. There is nothing like the normal, its just the degree of normalcy.
September 15th marked a day where 2 of my beloved folks breathed their last. My dear cousin Pradeep and my distant grand father , Sri Bargheesh Tata. I only pray the almighty to let their souls enter his space. Life has so much to offer, there is so much joy, so much pain, ups and downs , yet my question of what’s the purpose of our existence. This world has nurtured phenomenal thinkers like swami Vivekananda, Mother Theresa and others . They have definitely influenced us in the right direction, but have we retained those rich ideals, is so why still violence. What's all this bloodshed, so much of obtrusive things that’s gulping the harmony and peace on earth. Looks like peace has become an endangered entity and we all should unite to save it from extinction. Has man born only to enjoy?, is that all , is that everything. What’s life after death, what’s life beyond death. You cant stand against god’s plan and what has to happen will happen . Everything is planned and everything is destined. Death of others is a living example for the living before the living die .What goes will come back if it has to be fulfilled .Circle is the law of nature; circle is the geometry of nature. Sometimes, god himself is in a state of bizarre that he cant change the plan for us. I just recall the Buddha’s story where the lady approaches Buddha to revive her son back from death, when Buddha preaches, life and death are the laws of nature, nothing is permanent. There is no such place or house where there are no traces of death. We are all the puppets in the game played by time and fate. There is no ground for escapism.Sex,lust,wealth ,pain,gain,loss,luck,love are the various ingredients in the game of love.The dispersion of these ingredients is dictated by god, he is the master planner behind this master game of life. The entire envelope of life is karmic in nature. Each and everything is extrapolated and balanced in nature. Life is a containment of balancing scales, we , the individual on one and the karmas that has to be equalized on the other. What a perfect strike for that balance.
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Just Beautiful!!!
MIRAGE

Beautiful life with beautiful thoughts that emerge from a beautiful heart and a beautiful mind.
Beautiful be the world within. Beautiful be the world out.
Beautiful be the path to success, beautiful be the recover from failure.
Beautiful is the world above, beautiful is the world below.
Beautiful is the mystic nature , beautiful is the wild nature.
Beautiful is the grandeur of the riches, beautiful is the innocence of the poor.
Beautiful Is the compassion of mother, beautiful is the warmth of father.
Beautiful is the smile of a kid, beautiful is the wisdom of the old.
Beautiful is the sound of nature, beautiful is the beauty of nature.
Beautiful is the adversity of trauma , beautiful is the diversity of experience.
Beautiful is purity, beautiful is clarity.
Beautiful is everything, beautiful is nothing.
Beautiful is the buzzing, beautiful is the silence.
Beautiful is the silence, beautiful is the tranquil.
Beutiful is me, beautiful is you.
Beautiful is the life, beautiful is the death


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Be the transformation you want to see
MIRAGE

Hello. It’s fresh again. Looking at my previous 3 blogs, the quality had hit a rock bottom, a comment which was posted anonymously shook me once , and I pledge there should not be negative overtones in my blog henceforth. The lessons learnt so far can alone be accounted for next few blogs. It was indeed a great lesson learnt and that single comment seems to have changed the direction of my life, my thinking and my perspective for ever. I wouldn’t have spared that bloody for sure, but I am taking an advantage for that comment for my improvement. One interesting fact is that people viewed my blog seriously and seem to have taken it so personally, that they ended up throwing some pulverizing comments, LOL, and I think that’s really funny. And it was really hilarious of me for having declared a disclaimer at the opening note and warning people not to read it, oxymoronic soul I am. I was being funny. Then it clicked to my idiotic mind to change the URL. In fact my cousins got pandemic to a point where they started warning me against blogging daily. I don’t find a deal, for now onwards its all fairy tale, all the splendid pictures that I could only dream off. But its not going to be dream anymore, for its all going to be captured in the same proportion in my blog and I should be enthralled to see this exponential curve in the beauty of my blog.Today onwards its truly private in a way , even my subconscious mind should not be aware of. I was just making a fool of an ass by showcasing my folly. What a fool on earth I was.I am still figuring out , was out there to display my artistic talents or to show my foolish a**.I learnt a great deal of lesson , and never again share my thoughts or plans with anyone. Its all going to be secured and locked in this blog. No access to external sources. Its safe here in this fantasy filled blog of mine.
But to be honest ,that bloody comment has twisted my life and I think its for better. Great lesson learnt indeed. Yes there might be days when I am not at my best and just writing something to fill my condition of blogging daily . But I am sure that certain days , my blog is going to be amazing. One day I just starting reading them all in a loop as though my life is flowing in water, I think its an amazing feeling
Yes I would like to see my life , just like a crystal maze , so pure and clear. But people think displaying conceitedness is a great attribute, I don’t see it a deal. I try to structure my blog so as to give the reader an impression of a logical flow of my blog, but that’s not the case anymore. Coming to the usage of flamboyant words, yeah makes sense for my vocab building activity, but my objective is for power ful thoughts rather than mere words. Now that I have the liberty to write , upload and read all for myself, I am in the most free form and going to make the best of it.
In a way I am on my spiritual quest , discovering my inner beauty , strengths , gifts, dreams ,desires on my way. Whatever it is , I need to work for my own upliftment.Its all in my mind, my heart , my brain.
I am just loving the new look of my blog. I feel like entering my world when I open that and the connection is almost automatic. I being moon in Piscean , have added a fish widget . I think its just made for me . I love my blog. I love me.

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