Be the transformation you want to see
MIRAGE

Hello. It’s fresh again. Looking at my previous 3 blogs, the quality had hit a rock bottom, a comment which was posted anonymously shook me once , and I pledge there should not be negative overtones in my blog henceforth. The lessons learnt so far can alone be accounted for next few blogs. It was indeed a great lesson learnt and that single comment seems to have changed the direction of my life, my thinking and my perspective for ever. I wouldn’t have spared that bloody for sure, but I am taking an advantage for that comment for my improvement. One interesting fact is that people viewed my blog seriously and seem to have taken it so personally, that they ended up throwing some pulverizing comments, LOL, and I think that’s really funny. And it was really hilarious of me for having declared a disclaimer at the opening note and warning people not to read it, oxymoronic soul I am. I was being funny. Then it clicked to my idiotic mind to change the URL. In fact my cousins got pandemic to a point where they started warning me against blogging daily. I don’t find a deal, for now onwards its all fairy tale, all the splendid pictures that I could only dream off. But its not going to be dream anymore, for its all going to be captured in the same proportion in my blog and I should be enthralled to see this exponential curve in the beauty of my blog.Today onwards its truly private in a way , even my subconscious mind should not be aware of. I was just making a fool of an ass by showcasing my folly. What a fool on earth I was.I am still figuring out , was out there to display my artistic talents or to show my foolish a**.I learnt a great deal of lesson , and never again share my thoughts or plans with anyone. Its all going to be secured and locked in this blog. No access to external sources. Its safe here in this fantasy filled blog of mine.
But to be honest ,that bloody comment has twisted my life and I think its for better. Great lesson learnt indeed. Yes there might be days when I am not at my best and just writing something to fill my condition of blogging daily . But I am sure that certain days , my blog is going to be amazing. One day I just starting reading them all in a loop as though my life is flowing in water, I think its an amazing feeling
Yes I would like to see my life , just like a crystal maze , so pure and clear. But people think displaying conceitedness is a great attribute, I don’t see it a deal. I try to structure my blog so as to give the reader an impression of a logical flow of my blog, but that’s not the case anymore. Coming to the usage of flamboyant words, yeah makes sense for my vocab building activity, but my objective is for power ful thoughts rather than mere words. Now that I have the liberty to write , upload and read all for myself, I am in the most free form and going to make the best of it.
In a way I am on my spiritual quest , discovering my inner beauty , strengths , gifts, dreams ,desires on my way. Whatever it is , I need to work for my own upliftment.Its all in my mind, my heart , my brain.
I am just loving the new look of my blog. I feel like entering my world when I open that and the connection is almost automatic. I being moon in Piscean , have added a fish widget . I think its just made for me . I love my blog. I love me.

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Whatever!!!
MIRAGE

My monkey mind is hovering between happy and sad states from morning , and acting really crazy . I am liking it though and looks like the affirmation of blogging daily is a great transformation within me , and one day I wish to be the best writer out there. I don’t mind my recognition , but just wanting to break my bench mark. Just tabbing across different screens and typing this, as in when there is unattended time when the server is booting or some thing J hehe funny me , funny servers. ….always been a hard core server service girl…hihiehehehuuiyiuiiu….servers ….the AMD and the Intel CPU’s….my kids…..LOL…just kidding…man I just cant afford to be serious always ya….I know when to ease it down,….just a min, will PASS this test….the Raritan is down appending few more minutes to the downtime. So life is just going on man. Just learning to be light within , cant promise to be self composed, but yes at least for the brain jogging , will write daily. Great thing. I hate piracy, I always praise anything in its rudimentary form , I just hate all those copy and paste stuff, and believe me even to reuse a word again in this blog is a bit of glitch to me. Sipping the coffee reminiscing good and bad memories of the past, having a sense of pride for having done something good, I can never think otherwise. Tomorrow is our celebration of 61st year of Indian Independence. The air is filled with fervor and patriotism , alas I am not exempted from punching in for work tomorrow. Not bad, my mind has gotten serious at work ,...the pace seems to be good. Lets see how far J….keep on my mindYou Know what , by this time , at my age , I wanted to achieve something tremendous and nerve cracking, I don’t know , this feeling of not having accomplished something is still triumphing in my mind.Achievement to me is definitely not the bank balance , but everyone these days are smitten by it. Something that is impacting to the impoverished sect of the society, and anything that’s surpassed my expected level of stimulations on any of the challenging planes. But yes, going forward will work personally toward certain initiatives to feel more connected for the meaningful part of life to serve the fellow human beings in whichever way possible, to the best of my ability. I must admit today, I have been selfish all these days, always inundated about thoughts for achieving self excellence, means to overcome these snobbish phobias impregnated deep , so hard. But yes, the time for translation to more meaningful realm has unfolded. At this juncture I pray the almighty with deepest feelings, from the depths of my heart to give me the energy, Its not about achievements …its about your face value with reference to the people whom I have guided and yes today I determine this is my motto. Its not about the age, its about the wisdom which serves the humanity. Its not about the wealth , its about the richness of a beautiful heat and mind with a purpose to serve the humanity. Its flowing from within, truly feeling so happy, I am at my best version today. God thanks so much, how could I ever thing of ending my soul and I had so much in store…I am sorry for myself. I have a golden heart , I always exude rays of warmth, goodwill ,compassion in its purest form. I truly thank god for this priceless intensity of my being to stand by the truth and to be fair in all means. Today its life is gleaming , may be to tell me its more meaningful than I thought. I must appreciate a substantial shift in the tone in which I started the first line and ending it with greater sense of purpose in life
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The two hemispheres
MIRAGE


Hey there!!!!...Oh sorry could not catch up with the blog since 2 days..here I bounce back again. Yet another moronic Monday .The day was triggered by a pounding headache(contributing to the Monday bluesJ) , which woke me up and companied me till noon, after which it had to subside by 2 powerful pills. Back to the normal state by end of 3 pm. Was experimenting with couple of web templates and found the current one apposite to my concept of blogging daily.”Coffee Desk”, I think the template looked fab to me.Put all your thoughts in a notebook(not laptop) and engrossed yourself in a cup of cappuccino. Will retain this for quite some time, another contender being the “Eclipse”, somewhat made for the dark souls, would put that on some time. Well again my mind was inoculate with dark thoughts , funny it seems, the thoughts interfering me are the people afflicted with hurly burly mind. Man , what mind we human beings possess. The thought of all these obscurities within and around is constantly ruminating me. Man as I know , no doubt is the most intelligent animal, but I bet he cant overpower the power of might nature. Is this some sought of complexity or perception which is driving me to thing in this direction.Dont know, but if this is the case hell with my bloody mind.Why cant I be contented with what I am currently, was I before ???, Yeah may be , I was quite glad for certain period of time last decade.
But I am constantly warning myself against this behavior, and if I continue with this mindset of wanting to be the best in the world, just the contrary might prove pushing me to doldrums. I am working with greater thrust to extinguish this trait. I hope to succeed In near future. I regret for being sensitive on auras , energies and other aspects of human enigma. Its enrooted, that I almost correlate to all the happenings around me .Its become a OCD. Unfortunately, majority of folks these days are devolving to primates loosing out on most precious human qualities , the virtues everything. They are just animals. I feel animals are much more purer than us. They have it all, beauty, honesty , trust , faith everything. Where are we human beings disposing all these attributes to. I agree man has his share of wealth , lust ,sex that has to be enjoyed in due course of time and I find it unfounded to breathe by the same philosophy for an entire life time. Apart from the communication and the intelligence attributes that’s discrete to the homosapiens, one powerful quality that’s unique to us is the power of introspection. Why wouldn’t anyone want to think themselves in their purest form, be in sense with their inner voice. This lack of introspection is the breeding ground for all our sufferings today. Today’s funda of everyone to be “UNIQUE” and “ DIFFERENT” are driving all of us crazy . What’s the fu**ng point here. Why cant we be elegant, that’s what we are born for. You enjoy, party till death, at the end of your life, when you are on your death bed, what is that you had introspected. What is that you did to distinguish yourself from others, don’t tell about wine, woman/man , wealth . There is so much more that had to be accomplished, then you realize. I shall pledge, God has his law of equilibrium executed in all forms of existence. There is one crux which I realized today, realization of 2 hemispheres’ in everything.
Just think of this, the equator which is divides the globe into two hemispheres, the north and south, air and land, land and water, Man and woman, left brain and right brain , here is one such think two sects of people , the good and bad. Yes this is the truth, and this exists , the intentions of these 2 category of people so diverse in views, their philosophy , the way they live and lead the life, their tastes in life, its so different and one find the other as far from normal and that’s true . You can just pick that emotions , and mostly it’s the negative energies of the bad sect that affects the psyche of the sensitive and the good souls and I am experiencing the same. For me energies really matter it either compounds with good energies or fragments when collided with negative energies, and this not only affects me at a mental level , but also at the physical level and that’s what precisely struck me toady morning. These days my antennas detect mostly correctly where I shall go, whom to speak etc, but some time stumble so badly, that I hurt myself so badly for having collided the negative energies and me in the mode of recuperating from that. Well, I always pray god to keep me safe from the dick headed world, but these nasty confrontations are almost inevitable . I am a GENIUS when shrouded with positive energies, and don’t my energies quick shunts when in contact with negative vibes. God , is this a boon or a bane. Help me. I try to avoid consciously and in fact in better shape than before in this case . But still afresh from one such incident. I don’t know , why people work so much to satiate their grudge . I have seen people making conspicuous efforts to accomplish this task .Sad and sadists I would call them , mere shame. I only pray god to shield me from all these , help me out god. You are my positive energy , you drive me towards positive energies and that makes me positive to prorogate positive energy. Its all about positive and negative energies, as I mentioned above the 2 spheres of existence and the life and death to conclude it.










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Take it easy policy ...
MIRAGE

Just got this idea of taking a line from the song composed by A.R.Rehman, “urvasi urvasi take it easy policy” to be the centric for my blog, and this flashed to me during my morning jog. Believe me it makes so much sense to take the life easy to an extent . I think human beings are just hardwired to be adept in complicating the things, circumstances, to put it across, legitimately everything around and hell for no reasons. We all come to existence through our lineage and life starts from schooling , college, work so on so forth, and we do the same with lot of tenacity and perseverance. But as life evolves and different facets of life beautifully unveils in front of you, you will inevitably be thrown into situations where there is a call for wise judgments. In this juncture , it’s the mindset of the person which enables him to do the move with causality or just casually.
There is just no guarantee that the life goes the way we have adorned it to be in our minds, and life is so intelligent that surely knows to put a person into awful confrontations and sometimes where there is no scope for escapism . I would just leave it the way life wants to ride it for me and there will be no act of resistance from my side. For this being time tested, things have never worked the way I wanted it and hard fact of life I have known not to live life by expectations , rather take it as it comes and see what best I can reap out , to the opportunities posed to me. Atleast me yes, I have always dreamt for the best things, to be the “perfectionist”,”numero uno” in what I want to be. But no things are just not the way I am thinking, infact quite strayed . I have a subtle ego and not sure if this is acting as an impediment to what I want to see in the future. I have idealized certain guidelines and sometimes in constant process of paralleling them to real life situations and the results some times are devastating. From a theological standpoint the ultimate aim of any human being is to reach the almighty , but then this utmost truth is masqueraded by all the happenings on earth and then I spring with a thought for myself “ Is this life worth to be taken seriously “.
Posed with an interrogation for my flair in life , there would be literally no activities that go unquoted,so as to say I want to assume the best form in what I perceive , I literally want to be the top in all propositions. But at the end of it, its just me , just so simple thriving some way to leave a mark on the land I am walking. I am committing a cardinal error for having thought so.People out there are just so cocky. Every one exploits my feelings , emotions everything man. Why is this I am targeted for this raunchy attitude of people when I am the last soul to probe people . Until recently , I was just aware of the exploitations in other areas , but its so reaming to experience that in love. Honestly, frankly my heart bleeds. I just wanted nothing but true Love . I just failed to get one in this life. Its saddening, atleast for me who have all through my years foreseen , that the best culmination from me is going to be inspired by love. Nobody would believe this , but yes I am a zest for true love. People have even entered and have caused a tumult in this Sanctus sanctorum space of my being and this has left me shattered and makes me so vulnerable at times. Its sometimes so hard to imagine whats life next. But yes , here again I bounce back with self agitation that, life is definitely not worth to being taken seriously atleast for all these fu**ing people out there . I become selfish again, working to develop a strong mind which is going to remain unabashed by all the atrocities faced to it. I know , at the end of it , its about you loving yourself . Just me, I don’t know any boundaries., sky is the limit. Just be the way I am and end of it. Let the perfectionists continue to galore the world with their musings . I will remain stern , strong as a pillar , will not sway to delusions of the wicked world and its people. I will in the course of time, develop the best will power and intellect so strong. I will. But in light of my current plight , life is definitely given a thought “Take it easy policy “.
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